Back on Track

Today is weigh-in day.  I lost a pound this week, weighing in at 274.  Not optimum results, but certainly better than gaining weight.  I'm still cooking at least one new item a week to add variety to my meals and eating healthy foods.  No fast, fried or processed foods.  (Well, except for the creamer in my coffee, that is.  I haven't gotten used to coffee without creamer.)  Some of those healthy foods are very tasty, like the foccacia recipe that I adapted to use whole wheat flour.  It's hard to eat just one serving.  Actually, it's hard to eat just two... or three....

Speaking of food, take a peek at my indoor garden.  Salad is on this week's menu!

Things are looking up, I think.  It's funny, but how early I wake up seems to be an indicator of how well my day goes.  I woke up this morning at a quarter to six.  That's almost back to what had become my usual wake up time of 5:30.  So, I'm taking that as a positive sign. 

I feel like I am able to go back to my recovery toolbox and implement those strategies today.  I've already written my to-do list for today.  It will keep me productive today, but it is modest enough that I can get it all done.  Why have I struggled lately and now feel like I really can get back on track today?  I don't know.  There have been a few things that have contributed to my shift in direction.  Writing a daily blog forces me to take an honest look at myself.  It, like my sleeping pattern, is such a good barometer of how I am doing.  Whenever I find it difficult to write, I know I am getting off track.  It doesn't mean that I always can fix it, but at least I can recognize it.  I can't ignore it; I know it's there.

Words of encouragement have helped, too.  Because I've tried to look at myself with a critical eye, I've tended to focus on the negative and disregard the positive.  It's good to be reminded of how far I've come and to realize that the road to recovery is not smooth and straight.  It's especially important right now because I am on a break from WRAP.  The good news is that classes will begin again on Monday.  It will be interesting to see what I get out of them this time around. 

It's been difficult to write about struggles without presenting a solution at the same time.  That has always been my pattern.  I would stew over a problem until I had figured out a "solution."  That solution would make me feel better, but it rarely worked.  It was a challenge this time to simply report that I was not doing great and to leave it at that - no solutions offered.  But, I think in the long term, it helped.  Like daily blogging, it kept me honest.  It's a bit like the first step in addiction - I admitted that I had a problem and was powerless to know what to do about it.

So, in the end, it was a combination of things that helped me move forward.  Thank you for continuing to read!

Of course, I would be remiss if I didn't give out a big, "Geaux, Saints!"  Conference championship tomorrow!

Don't wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful.  ~~Mark Victor Hansen