Forward Progress?

I've been going to bed around 9 o'clock, and most nights, I easily fall asleep.  Last night, however, was a challenge.  I wasn't at all sleepy; I felt energetic.  I went to bed just after 10:30, and I knew that I would have to calm myself down in order to get to sleep.  I've tried many times before in the past without success.  I've tried relaxation techniques, aroma therapy, and listened to soothing sounds, all to no avail.

I'm sure it took me more than an hour to go to sleep last night, and I had to continually work to shut off my mind.  But I never got restless.  I managed to stay relaxed.  It was a victory of sorts. 

Today I am facing the same challenge - calming myself down.  What has gotten me so wound up?  A friend of mine showed me a job posting that made her think of me.  I'm not sure that I am ready to go back to work, and just considering it excites me.  I find myself fantasizing about the job, and I don't know what it entails.  So, for today, my job is to focus on the here and now.  I'm making a list and checking it twice.  It's a good test to see if I can stay calm and grounded in the here and now. 

It's a big decision.  I need to know that I can "maintain an even strain," as in The Right Stuff.  I don't want to crash and burn.  I don't expect to have all the answers, nor do I expect to have a struggle-free life, but I want to feel confident that I will recognize and ask for help when I need it, and keep those avenues open.  Regardless of the outcome, though, it will be a good exercise for me to apply for the job.  Fingers crossed, mind focused on today.